The voice in my head, is it the same voice in your head? Probably not but I’m tipping it behaves the same as mine. There are days when my internal voice natters away at a rapid speed, sometimes louder than I’d like, it reminds me of an annoying mosquito that is buzzing around my ear and will not leave me alone.

Our internal dialogue is so strong, often loud and overpowering at times, and it’s really hard to turn the volume down or switch it off completely when we go about our daily tasks. So for those of us that interact with people all day, either with clients, serving customers or leading teams, who are we listening to?

Are we listening to the person in front of us or our own ego – mind?

Stephen R. Covey author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, says that “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

When we give power over to our ego – mind, usually it’s going to take its role pretty seriously and get in the way of you being fully present.

The common state of ego-mind is that it almost never wants to be in the same place the body is. “Anywhere but here”. The ego – mind is very tricky, very cunning, it avoids being present and still. The other day I experienced an interaction with a member of staff that clearly had given power to her ego-mind.

All she presented to me as the customer in this interaction was their internal rules, policies and reasons why I couldn’t have the product I purchased in a certain way. In fact when she finally shut down her ego-mind for a second and listened to what my request was, it turned out that she was able to meet my needs after all. By then it was too late, she had lost me and I was already thinking about where I’ll go next time… ‘anywhere but here’.

In the service sector I reckon listening with 100 percent attention is one of the most critical skills. To be attuned; the ability to listen with full receptivity.
We don’t care about your internal procedures, processes and policies – just serve me please and listen.

Jaquie Scammell
‘Love Being in Service’

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